Loves:

That I get a massage today...


Hates:

This headache that won't give up...
This wind...
Not knowing...

Hates:
Being alone.
My life.
This headache.

Hates:

my life

Loves:

That my medicine seems to be kicking in already....feeling some relief...
That I am on vacation and didn't have to miss work to be sick...


Hates:

Lupus...
Hurting all over....
Being sick...
Being alone...

Loves:

Being home...
Being on Christmas vacation...

Hates:

Being sick...
Being alone...

Loves:

My nice, warm bed...
My nice, warm flannel sheets...
My pillow...
My squishy pillow...
SLEEP.
Obi Wan Kanobee...

Hates:

Being lonesome.

Loves:
Sleep, when it cooperates...


Hates:
That baby Jakob is sick.

Loves:

When people step up, to make a difference...

When people realize the err of their ways...

Hates:

That children have to grow up too fast sometimes...

That life is way harder than I even thought possible...

Being alone...

Loves:

A phone call...
Surprises....
My secret Santa...

Hates:

Being alone.

Loves:

Sleep...


Hates:

Sitting for eight hours straight...ugh (workshops)

Loves:

Lazy Sundays...
Baby Jakob...
A clean kitchen...
My electric blanket...
The Kindle app on  my new phone!!!


Hates:

Workshops....ugh...
Learning how to use my new phone...
This big empty house.

Loves:

Spending time with my daughter-in-law and grandson...
Getting a new haircut!
Smiling again...
Laughing again...
Seeing new babies!!

Hates:

When my battery goes dead...
Having to buy a new battery...
This freezing cold wind...
This lonesome house...

loves:

road trips....just about time for one, I'd say...
sleep...
my squishy pillow...
when my kids are good...
fresh, hot brownies...
two special phone calls...
that I'll get my massage tomorrow...

hates:

that some of my kids are homeless...  :(
that my desk at school is cluttered right now...
that I will be gone on Monday...
that I have very little Christmas shopping done....bah humbug...

Loves:

That my dad had yet ANOTHER good day, AND he called me!!
I didn't cry today, and I was able to listen to the radio!!!
That I only have eight school days left before Christmas break!!!
That I now have no massages tomorrow, and can get home way earlier!!!
That my friend whisked me away today, to get away from it all!!!
That angels are watching over me...
My Christmas tree and it's twinkling lights...
God, in HIS infinite wisdom...thank you, Lord, for all you've done for me and mine...
Baby Jakob!
you.

Hates:

That I feel so stupid.
That I didn't do the right thing.
That I am SO gullible.
Paperwork...ugh...
Being oh, so, all alone in this world.
Full moons, changes in weather, and sugar!
That I can't just crawl into a hole and disappear forever.
That I can't just get in my truck and drive, with no particular destination in mind, for about a week...

Loves:

 That my dad had another good day, even better than yesterday!!!!
That I only have nine days left...then, Christmas break!
Getting a phone call....
My family and friends...


Hates:

Unhappy endings...

Loves:

That my dad is having a good day!!  Praise the Lord!!!
That I lost another pound!!  Yay!! 

Hates:

Feeling SO alone, still.
Learning how to use a new phone.....grrrr....
Losing precious pictures on my old cell phone...
Losing those last texts...  :(

Hates:

That I lost all of my texts and pictures on my phone!!!!!  Will never be able to replace them!  :(

Loves:
That I have two days off...

Hates:
That I broke my phone....grrrr....
Isolation...

Loves:

That tomorrow is Friday...

Hates:

The deafening silence...
Looking at my phone, and seeing no texts...
or phone calls...
Being alone...
No contact...
Broken promises...
This hole in my heart...

Loves:

A day without tears...
My kids...
My grandbaby...
My dad...

Hates:

The silence...
Losing...

Hates:

Feeling sick at my stomach again....
Feeling all alone in the world, for the rest of my life...
Being heartbroken, again...
That this is not the answer to prayer I was hoping for...
Feeling lost...
Having this HUGE hole in my heart...

Hates:

This day.
My life.

Loves:

Putting up the Christmas tree and decorations...
Holding my grandbaby...
Watching him smile...
Talking to you....
Listening to Christmas music...

Hates:

Feeling like a failure...
Feeling alone...
Being alone...
That OSU lost... :(

Loves:

My Thanksgiving break...
Being with you...
Being with family...

Hates:

Indecision...
Not knowing...
Interruptions...
Misunderstandings...
Someone being upset with me...
Being alone.

Loves:

Going to bed early...on my way...
The smell of jerky in the dehydrator...
That tomorrow is FINALLY Friday...


Hates:

This headache that I've had for almost seventeen hours now...
This scratchy throat..
Coughing...
Distance...I. HATE. YOU.

Loves:

3:15...
Friday...
End of May...
Weekends...
Sleep...
Snowdays...
Phone conversations...
Fireplaces...
The carpet of leaves on my front lawn...

Hates:

Workshops...
Sitting...
Paperwork...
Deadlines...

Loves:

My warm and fuzzy OSU houseshoes...
My iPod which has put me to sleep many, many nights recently...
Rainy days...
Old, warm sweatshirts...
Rainy nights...
A certain baby next door...


My favorite baby next door....



Warm and fuzzy OSU houseshoes....ahhhh...




My blue iPod, which helps me go to sleep at night...

 That I stepped on the scales this morning, and had lost THREE more pounds, a total of TWENTY pounds!!!!  :)

Hates:

Distance...
Sadness...
Depression...
When people give up...

Loves:


Rainy weekends...
Lots of movie watching...
OSU football win...
and that "other" team winning...
sleep...


Hates:

Distance, not only in miles, but, emotions...
Feeling helpless...
Feeling lost...
Feeling lonely...
Mondays...
workshops...
Indecision...
Early darkness...
Daylight Savings Time...

Loves:

Flannel sheets...
Electric blankets...
Chocolate animal crackers....
A note from my daughter...
My sweet son and daughter-in-law...
Jakob....
Texts, e-mails, and phone calls from you...
Amazing grace...
You.

Hates:

Distance...
Distance...
Distance...

Loves:

Fall days...
you....

Hates:

workshops....

Loves:

Making it through Thursday, with only one more day to go...
The smell of popcorn....
Sweet sleep...
e-mail...


Hates:

October...
Being sick...

Misses:

Living in the country...
Burning brush...
Roasting marshmallows in that brush fire...
The smell of hay...
The smell of horses...
Burning a fire in the fireplace...
Having a garden...
My mom...
My brother...
You...

Loves:

That I only have two more days until the weekend...
The sunrise in my rear-view mirror this morning...
The crisp, cool air...
Sweater weather...
The yellow leaves on the tree outside my window at work...


Hates:

Being sick...
That the sunrise reminded me of one more thing we didn't do together...
Getting into my truck after work, and immediately hearing one of  "those" songs...
Hearing the text alert on my phone, then, looking at it...
The silence...
Being the last choice...again.

Loves:
You.

Hates:
This.

Loves when:

I make it through a Monday...
Sound sleep keeps the nightmares away...
Words match actions...

Hates when:

I go through another day with a sick stomach....
I go through another day lost and alone...
Words don't match actions...

Loves:

That I am able to listen to most music now, and NOT cry...
I am on Fall Break...

Hates:

That I am having HORRIBLE nightmares...
That I wake up screaming and crying because of those nightmares...
That said nightmares make me want to vomit...


Dear Lord,
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE take these nightmares away....

Loves when:                                                                

People tell me the truth the FIRST time, when given the opportunity....
People do the right thing....
Life makes me smile...
God sends me a "Te amo" when I need it the most....
God has a sense of humor...
I get my hair washed, by someone else...
I paint, I write, I finish something...
It rains...
The leaves are turning colors...
I sleep ALL night long, without waking up crying...
I find a song that I can relate to...
I can spend time with my kids...
I try something new...


Hates when:

People repeatedly refuse to tell the truth, when given the opportunity...
People do the selfish thing, myself included...
Life makes me cry...
I feel like God forgot about me...
I feel all alone...
I wake up at 1:00 a.m., not able to go back to sleep...
I wake up at 3:00, crying...
I wake up at 4:30, after having a nightmare, and I cry again...
I hear a song that makes me cry...
I have to listen to silence...
I have to wait...
I constantly feel sick at my stomach....
I feel like I'm in limbo...
I can't look forward, only backward...

Loves:

Spending a Sunday morning with my grandson...
Spending a Sunday afternoon with my daughter, home from college...
An unexpected call...
Being able to listen to music again without crying, at least for today..
Hope...
The comfort of being at home...
That my daughter STILL needs me...


Hates:

That my daughter is having such a hard time adjusting to college...
That I can't do much to help her with this adjustment, except listen...
That I can't "fix" it...
Uncertainty...
Waiting...
Distance...

Loves:

When sleep finally comes...
When sleep stays....
When an old friend calls...
A short road trip to clear  the mind...
That I'm losing weight...
That God has a sense of humor, that I'll never understand...
Hugs from my kids....
The safety of my home...

Hates:

Being sick at my stomach for over a week...
Distance...
Being such a whiney baby...
Feeling this way...
The circumstances that are killing me right now...
Isolation...
Loneliness...

Love it when:

A team works together, to help a kiddo...

Friday FINALLY cooperates and rescues me...

I get my toes all prettied up...

My offspring calls me on the phone WITHOUT being prompted...

My house is pretty close to being all clean!!

A kiddo smiles because you just helped him finish four assignments...


Hate it when:

A kiddo is hurting inside, but, can't tell you why...

Full moons and drastic changes in weather make my students do weird things...

Fridays take SOOooooo long to get here to rescue me...

The road is too long...

The day is not long enough, and

The weekend is WAY too short...

Thursday's thoughts...

Lovin':

The slow, sweet rain, and the oh, so welcome, cloudy, cool day it brings...

James Taylor's tunes playing in the background of my classroom all day long...
and in my truck, on the way to and from school...I missed you James, where have you been man, and by the way, you have aged well.  I've loved you since junior high.

A wonderful, much needed massage...
Can I say it again?  MY MASSAGE DAY - THURSDAY!!!!!

Acrostics written by my students...

That moment when I get through to THAT student...

Good friends, who also have good shoulders...

My guy...


Hatin':

Picture day at school...ugh...I always, I mean ALWAYS skip out on the first day of pictures (not school, just the pictures!), then, I am always, I mean ALWAYS forced to have my picture taken on "re-take" day....(my most un-favorite day of the year at school)....in the hopes that I will lose another 10-50 pounds between now and then....ha!! Not one, but, maybe a dozen or so of my students asked, "Did you get your picture taken?"  I answered with, "No, not yet."  Of course, they all said, "Well, you better get it done now!!",  to which I always replied, "I will, later."  Boy, will I be in trouble when the secretary finds out!!

That I'm truly feelin' the proverbial "empty nest syndrome" BIG TIME!!!

Distance, again...

That I am so DANG emotional about the whole empty nest thing!!  

When I NEED to get through to that OTHER student, but can't seem to...


"Just call out my name, and you know, wherever I am, I'll come runnin'..."

Likes / Dislikes

Likes:

Getting something accomplished...
Being with people I love and care about...
Watching baby Jakob (my brand-new grandson) smile!
Watching my son, Jake, grill out!
Walking with my daughter-in-law, Amanda...
Coffee with hazelnut creamer and an ample amount of sugar...



Dislikes:

Missing my daughter, Morgy, who is away at college...
Not getting phone calls from said daughter...
This caffeine headache...
Distance....
Cleaning house!!!
Coffee without cream and sugar...

Like......don't like.....

What I like today:

writing;
the song, "Angels Among Us", by Alabama;
venting;
the song, "You Make Me Smile, by Uncle Kracker;
my pillow;
a cute little 6 yr. old, named Jennifer, who showed me all 27 of her Zany bands, counted to 43, spelled her name, and said her ABCs for me, while I was getting a pedicure from her mom...;
and sweet tea, from McAlister's Deli.


What I don't like today:

myself;
pouting;
distance;
feeling all alone;
and
procrastination.

Back to School...

     It's simply amazing how time flies during summer breaks, fall breaks, Christmas breaks, and Spring breaks!!  Some teachers, including myself, live for the breaks.  I'm not one bit ashamed to admit it.  I'm just a big 'ol kid who STILL loves my vacations and breaks away from school.  With that said, this past summer break had to have been one of THE best summer vacations I have EVER had.  I just can't say it enough.  It was THE BEST summer break ever!!!  Many changes, many new beginnings, a daughter finishing high school and beginning college, a new grandbaby, the first, actually.  Excitement all around! 

     One never knows when life if going to take a new and different turn, that was never even thought might be even remotely possible.  Yet, somehow, it's these unexpected turns that can be the most welcome, warm, and wonderful surprises.  Just when I thought I had life all figured out and had actually come to terms with it....life gave me an amazing new twist.  I'll discuss this further, at a later date...


     Some current likes:
Braum's Birthday cake ice cream, which also happens to be a beautiful shade of blue.
Rainy, cool weather in the middle of August...
The smell of a new box of Crayola brand crayons....
A new Pentel fine point black ink pen....
The fact that my daughter has met two major milestones that health issues could have prevented many, many years ago...graduation from high school and attending college this fall....

     Some current dislikes:
The fact that my daughter now lives in a dorm two hours away from me...
The fact that I can't actually watch my daughter take her handful of heart meds. in front of me, twice a day...
The fact that I can't talk to my daughter as often as I'd like...
The fact that my daughter's vehicle could fall apart at any moment, and she thinks it's the most wonderful truck in the whole wide world...

Loves it when:
Friends are happy when you have good news....
Life gives you a second chance...
I finish a good book...
Babies get to come home...
People grow up...


Hates it when:
I lose my temper...
People don't follow through...
Someone I love is hurting...
Someone's "word of honor" means nothing...
Kids grow up...

Loves:                                                             Hates:
Mudslides                                                             Mondays
YOU!                                                                    the devil
crispy, clean white sheets                                      whiners
the smell of rain coming                                         flat tires
cicadas in the summer                                          chiggars and ticks
old pickup trucks                                                  snakes
whipporwills                                                          clutter
listening                                                               injustice
observing                                                              nobody
the way a horse smells                                          the way pigs smell
roadtrips                                                              slow left lane drivers
spider webs with dew on them                               slugs

       

Ahhhh.....this is where I REALLY want to be right now!!!  I'm ready to go again!

Human emotions...boy, do they run the gamet. How is it possible to be extremely happy, yet, horribly sad at the same time?

That is how I feel right now. I have tons of things that I am extremely happy about right now. I am truly blessed, and happier than I have EVER been in my whole entire life.

Yet, there is much sadness, at the moment. A dear friend just lost her sweet, six month old grandbaby. Little Trenton. Such a beautiful, happy baby boy. Sent to Heaven WAY too early. Yet, God knows how that baby was suffering, and how much he'd been through in the last six months. This baby had a heart condition which required several procedures and surgeries. He's been in the hospital more than he's been at home with his sweet mom and dad. God was ready for this sweet little rosebud to quit suffering and go home to Heaven. Jesus is holding him in his arms, and many sweet grannies waiting in line to cuddle him and rock him to sleep, including my sweet, sweet moma...

Wow!! It's a wonderful life!!! One of my favorite movies!! I know, I know, that's a Christmas movie, you say. But, isn't it a great lesson? We often don't appreciate what we have, until we lose it. Don't we all do that at some point in our lives? I know I have on numerous occasions. However, on the other side of the coin, there's also a really good song that goes something like this..."and I thank God, for unanswered prayers...", sung by a pretty famous Okie. That song has applied to my life, as well, many, many times. Thank you, Lord, for answering my prayers, in the way YOU see fit, not necessarily the way I THINK or WANT them to be answered. YOU, my Lord, are an awesome God!!! I love you!!

Either way, it's always been my belief that everything REALLY does work out the way it's supposed to,...eventually. Isn't God great, in that way? He DOES know what is best for us, and he DOES supply our NEEDS. That's why we are not supposed to worry about things going on in our lives. Just let God deal with it. He's very well-equipped to deal with ALL of our problems, LET HIM!! I'm so glad God knows better than I do, what's best for me!!

Thank you, Lord, for everything You have done for me and mine. I LOVE my life!!

Okay, so, I deleted every post except my "bucket list". Can't believe it's been over three years since I last posted something!! Life has been SO busy!! Much to tell. Hopefully, will catch up this summer